The word ‘love’ takes on many different forms and meanings. There are casual ‘luv ya’ texts to a friend, the love we share between family members, the love we have for a best friend, and then there is the deep, intimate love we feel for another. The type of love that can be expressed by no other way than the genuine, look-you-in-the-eye: “I love you.”
When a man reaches the point with a woman where he professes this feeling to her, there are many different implications that come along with the statement. The words themselves are only words, what gives them meaning is the commitments he makes when he says them.
Your happiness is my happiness.
To love someone is to link your emotions to theirs. To share in their happiness and to lend them your strength to heal their pain. As Robert A. Heinlein eloquently stated: Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.
I think you’re perfect, even though I know you’re not.
Obviously, nobody is perfect. When a man really loves a woman though – everything about her becomes beautiful. And not just physical beauty, but her quirks or the way she walks or talks or talks to babies or puppies. He knows that she has flaws, but he doesn’t care, because love is about fully accepting the good along with the bad.
I will keep my promises through my actions.
Just like ‘I love you’ are only words, so are promises when they are not kept. The right man will understand that people who make promises do not deserve your respect – people who keep promises do. He will never stop proving to you that he says what he means, and means what he says.
I respect you.
You cannot love someone you do not respect. When you do love someone, though, your respect for them grows deeper. You respect their thoughts, feelings, and opinions as if they were your own. You take these things into consideration when making decisions that affect you both. And perhaps most importantly, you never act in ways that betray the trust of those you respect.
I trust you.
Another cornerstone of love, is trust. As the anonymous quote goes: Love is giving someone the power to destroy you, but trusting them not to. But the trust that comes along with love is not just trusting this person will not betray you. It is a trust that they are making the same commitments to you when they say these words back to you. It is the trust that you can count on them as they can count on you. It is the trust that they will be honest with you, as you are to them.
I will never stop putting in effort for you.
Love is not just a word, it’s not just a noun – it’s a verb. It requires action to truly exist. It requires effort. It requires consistency. When it comes to love, our generation seems to be setting off fireworks. There is a spectacular display that is quite often beautiful, but unpredictable and ends as quickly as it began. Leaving behind only the memory of the experience.
Older generations set fires. They would begin to burn with a small smoldering flame and eventually evolve into a roaring blaze as they continued to stoke it. The right man will understand that the effort it took to capture your heart will be the same effort it will take to keep it.
I am here for you, no matter what.
Being in love and committing to someone is not a fair-weather endeavor. It is not a part time job. You are either in, or you’re out. This means standing beside her on the sunny days, but also holding the umbrella over her on the rainy days. Taking care of her when she is sick, comforting her in a time of need, taking on life’s challenges together.
Commitment is not a matter of convenience, it is a matter of staying true to what you said you were going to do, long after you said it.
I can picture a future with you.
When a man falls in love with a woman, his life is no longer just his life. “You and I” have become “us,” and when he begins to think about his future, she is in it with him. To fall in love with a woman is to picture the potential of a life together and all of the joys it has to offer – only they will be enhanced, because he will be spending it with her.
I don’t know what life was like without you.
It may hit you when you receive an affectionate text message or when you’re joking about something together walking side by side in the city, but suddenly you realize that parts of your life seem like a bit of a blur before this woman came into it. Of course it’s important for us to all keep a grip on our past and the lessons it taught us, but suddenly the heartache seems to fade away and your attention shifts to the illuminated future.
I don’t care about your past, I just want to be your future.
Along with love, comes perspective. Maturity teaches us that we all have a past, parts of which are better than others. The point is that while we always carry our past with us, it doesn’t have to define us. And when we love someone – it is certainly not what defines them, either. We begin to create our own world with this person. Our own memories. Our own traditions. Our own life together.
We realize that who someone was, is not who they are. The windshield is bigger than the rearview for a reason – it’s fine to glance back every now and then, but if you focus on it for too long, you will probably crash.
Love feels no burden, thinks nothing of trouble, attempts what is above its strength, pleads no excuse of impossibility; for it thinks all things lawful for itself, and all things possible. – Thomas a Kempis
Picture Credit: We Heart It